I warn you these jokes are "corny"
Old mathematicians never die, they just lose some of their functions.
math classroom sign read, "Mathematics
dispensed here, bring your own
the math student's exam wet when the teacher returned it?
Why did the student eat his math
Trigonometry for farmers: swine and coswine.
How do you make seven even? .... (take away the "s")
Two's company, and three's a crowd, but what is four and five? .... (nine)
What would a math student say to a fat parrot? .... (poly-no-mial)
What would you say if someone's parrot had died? .... (poly-gon)
What would you say if someone took your playing cards? .... (dec-a-gon)
What kind of insect is good at math? .... (an account-ant)
Why do lumberjacks make good musicians? .... (because of their natural log-a-rithms)
What did Noah build? .... (an arc)
How do kids like their ice cream served? .... (cone)
What do you call a sunburned man? .... (a tan-gent)
What does a bloodhound do when chasing a woman? .... (cent-er)
What do you call a person who writes for an inn? .... (in-scribe)
What does an acorn say when he grows up? .... (ge-om-e-try)
What do you call a politically correct angle? .... (right)
What do you call a stubborn angle? .... (obtuse)
What do you call a pretty angle? .... (a-cute)
What do you do with yarn and a needle? .... (u-nit)
What do you do if you are outside during a thunderstorm? .... (co-incide)
What does a lumberjack do to trees? .... (axi-oms)
How do high schools schedule students for gym class? .... (bi-sects)
What does a dentist scrape from your teeth? .... (calculus)
What are eyeglasses good for? .... (di-vision)
What do clowns do after April 30th? .... (ma-trix)
What do mathematicians sleep on? .... (ma-trices)
What does a bull add with? .... (a cow-cu-lator)
What would you call someone who counts their fingers? .... (a digit-al computer)
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a
What do you get when you add 50 female pigs and 50
What does a mathematician call the occupied restroom
on an airplane?
When a student asked her grandmother for help
"finding the least common
A father, angry because his teenage daughter had
missed her curfew, told
Calculus students are sometimes clueless.
They think that General Calculus was
and opinions expressed in this page are strictly those of Mary Lou Baker.
This page was edited on 02-Sep-2010